5 Tips. Cray Cray to Calm Mum

5 ways to be a calm mum No. 1=poo

So I’m in the car driving the kids to school this morning and I say “I’m going to write a blog today on being a calm Mum and do they have any ideas?” Who better to ask right?

So this is what I get:

  1. Poo
  2. Wee
  3. Do yoga
  4. Cry under a tree
  5. Listen to music

(My kids are at ‘that’ age…everything’s poo and wee)

I have been writing this blog in my head for a few days, and I think maybe their ideas are actually similar to mine, and said more simply.

  1. Yep, I can’t put it better…Poo. Make sure that you are eating well. Get enough green stuff, make a smoothie (I swear you can’t taste the spinach). Make sure you’re getting enough fibre. There are soooo many resources out there to look at that it might get a little confusing. Here’s my little tip, don’t diet. Eat well all the friggin’ time. Your body is your temple, treat it well. Save your treats for little treats, but make everything else that you put into your mouth really, really good. If it grows, eat it. If it has numbers in it, give it to your accountant. If you don’t poo, it sits in your belly, grows old, festers and your farts are really bad. Regular bowels=Calm Mum
  2. Wee. Again, I can’t say it better. Are you getting enough water? If your wee is yellow, drink…more…water!!! Your wee should be a clearish colour. If you hate water, figure out a way of improving it. Put some lemon in it, get one of those fancy schmancy infuser water bottles where you put fresh berries in it, drink it warm, drink it cold, drink it in a boat, with a goat, oh dear…enough reading Dr Suess at bedtime. But you get the drift. Drink more water. Your body needs water to function. The blood needs to be liquid enough to move, the brain needs water for the synapses to work, your fascia under your skin needs water to move with the muscles. Water keeps your weight down, water keeps you alert. You will get mega headaches if you don’t drink enough water, headaches=crabby Mum.
  3. Do Yoga. My kids recently asked about all the scars on my stomach, so I told them about all of my operations and let them know if I don’t do regular Yoga, I will end up back in hospital regularly again. Yoga works for me, part of the reason why I left school teaching and did my 500hr Yoga Teacher Training course. What works for you? Swimming works for my bestie, walking works for another, she calls it “walking her shit out.” You have to be living under a rock to not know that exercise is not only physically good for you, but mentally. It releases a good hormone called Endorphins from your brain and helps you deal with everyday life better. Exercise=Calm Mum. And don’t let me hear you say ‘I don’t have time’, we all have the same amount of hours in the day, take the stairs instead of the elevator, ride your bike to school with the kids, walk around the block when you drop them off, get a Zumba DVD, or better yet, become one of my private online members and I’ll ring you once a month so you’re accountable!
  4. Cry under a tree. I had to ask them a little more about this one. They said; ‘go under a tree and sit quietly and think about all the good things in your life, and you’ll probably cry because you’re happy.’ Well…that stopped me in my tracks. I’m going to leave it at that because I actually think it’s so good, only to say, that sometimes we need to have sad tears too and it’s good to get them out xx
  5. Listen to music, this was similar to the one that I was going to add in, saying ‘put good things around you’. I make it a point of speaking emotionally to my kids and I have said in the past “I hate this job, let’s put some groovy music on to make it more fun”, this is perhaps why they added it to the list. (My youngest once looked at me and ran for the stereo saying ‘quick, put some music on for Mum’, I must have had my thunder eyebrows on!) Music makes me happy, same with breezes. What makes you happy? Fresh picked flowers, happy photos, a clean and shiny sink, craft, plants, affirmations, vision boards, (here’s your link to the blog and you can also listen to it on ITunes), sewing, paintings, fresh linen, sand between your toes, funny movies etc etc… Most of the peeps I asked on Facebook and Instagram said ‘take some time to do something YOU like.’ It’s all about balance babe.

I promised the lovlies who answered on Instagram and Facebook that I would publish their answers ; here goes, which ones do YOU agree with?

Hahaha I’ll wait to read the blog!!! Lol

Don’t have kids….haha No seriously now actually wrote several things and then erased them all as they didn’t quite sum it up. So here is my take…. I believe that to be a calm parent you need to be happy with who you are and how you are living your life.

Don’t have kids

Instant fix or the one that takes A bit of prep? Instant: cuppa/ walk away and don’t forget to smile and joke with the kiddlets. The one with the prep: follow up on your hobbies at least once a week (get a babysitter if needed).

Valium

Sleep

Don’t worry about tomorrow. Let the house go to hell and enjoy just being

Time for myself most days- going to the gym helps immeasurably.Asking for help. And………. Sleeeeep. Oh and starting every day fresh. I’m working on not beating myself up for the times I don’t stay calm

Pick your battles

Don’t be a mum

Life balance

Don’t take life too seriously.

Laugh, have real fun. Stick to the 80 20 rule. Don’t argue with anyone lower/ smaller than your boobs. They are not the boss of you.

Lol.Look forward to reading it.

My only thought is listen to advice but if it doesn’t work for you throw it away & move on – there is no such thing as a perfect parent!! – or the perfect child!! – Do what feels right & do the best you know how!

Listen to and believe what your gut is telling you … that was my number one guiding principle of motherhood, especially when sifting through the maze of conflicting advice from “experts” and well-meaning non-experts. Mothers were successfully raising babies for millennia by just being mothers and doing what comes naturally.

What is strange thing called a “calm mum” you speak of???

Find some time for yourself – sometimes the hardest thing in the world, but a must to not loose yourself, we’re more than mum and/or wife!!!

Take the time to tickle and wet all people within 3 metres with a hose if you’re watering. When you sneeze make it massively loud. Such a tension release. Lol. Happy kids are beautiful kids and that equals calm in my book.

Sometimes you just need to walk away and try again later…..

Just be confident that you are doing the best you can with what you have, be kind to yourself, by that I mean you sometimes have to be selfish and put yourself first, oh and it’s okay to say no to your kids, the world won’t fall apart

Wine!! And chocolate and for me being able to do something that’s my own (sewing) and making time to do that- it rebalances me xx

What she said

Surrounding myself with friends who make you laugh is gold.

Figure out some strategies that work for you when you know you are getting to breaking point. Mine are to always tell a close girlfriend how I’m feeling and get out of the house. Fresh air and a bit of perspective works wonders.

Don’t expect perfection from your kids ,yourself or your house go with the flow and enjoy life every little bit even the crap stuff and smile always smile it fixes everything

Vodka!

Make sure you take time for yourself daily to reinforce that although you are a mum with a demanding job you are also a lovely person also… be kind to yourself.

Mantra – ‘this too shall pass’

Go to Tresillian were I work smile emoticon they were actually discussing this with a client today (NB: Victoria has not endorsed this)

Run away?

With love and light,

Victoria

Want to read more about becoming a mindful Mum?

Here’s a link to my latest book release ‘Will You Come To Bed With Me? Creating Mindful Moments with Your Family.’ http://bit.ly/1NYUTcz

Victoria Yuen

Author: Victoria Yuen

I LOVE to make people feel THE BEST that they can be!! I have devoted my life to this. I have had a lot of experience in the crappier side of life and have had to re-design my entire life, physically and mentally to live the life that I have now. I'm happy, healthy, fit and strong. Life is a learning journey and I am constantly looking for ways to improve my life and to help others do the same. I hope I can help you.xx

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